Just because someone used to be an important part of your life doesn’t mean you have to continue to cling to the friendship when it begins to die. Your relationship was once something beautiful and fulfilling, and that’s a wonderful thing. But at a certain point, no amount of watering and nurturing will bring it back to full bloom.
The fact that its deteriorated doesn’t mean you’re incapable of sustaining meaningful friendships. It doesn’t mean you’re not worth the time and effort it takes to maintain a connection. And it isn’t any sort of evidence that you’re a burden or a bad friend.
It just means that the relationship has run its course. It means that you’ve evolved into different people or moved apart or just lost each other in the clutter and preoccupation of life’s everyday demands.But it isn’t a reflection on your value as a person and friend.
It’s okay to mourn the loss of a relationship that used to have a special place in your heart. But if keeping yourself tethered to this person is causing more damage than healthy detachment and ongoing growth, it’s also okay to stop watering the friendship and let it die out.
You don’t have to sacrifice your wellbeing for the sake of maintaining a relationship that doesn’t serve you anymore. You’re allowed to be picky when it comes to the people you let into your mental and physical space. You’re allowed to conserve your time and energy only for people who reciprocate.
Because you deserve to feel seen and heard and cared for. You deserve relationships that make you feel fulfilled and connected. And no matter how long of a history you have with a person, you deserve to let go of any friendship that hurts you and forces you to prove your worth.
— Daniell Koepke (via internal-acceptance-movement) —
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